10 Sure Fire Ways to Wreck Love

By Pam & Bill Farrel

We’ve worked as relationship specialists for over 25 years, and we’ve “seen it all.” We have observed that there are 10 very common mistakes couples make, so in our book, The First Five Years, we list what will really mess up love no matter how long you have been married! Really, when a relationship dissolves, it boils down to one of two things: someone was selfish, or someone did something really stupid.

If you really want to mess up your future, do one of these selfish and stupid things:

1. Call up an old boyfriend or girlfriend and hang out

2. Compare your mate to your ex

3. Get involved in pornography, go to a strip club, or call an 800 # “love” line

4. Run up your credit cards

5. Give into a drug, alcohol, gambling or shopping addiction

6. Sit on the sofa instead of getting a job

7. Scream, belittle or hit your spouse

8. Lie

9. Run home to mom and dad every time there is an argument

10. Actually believe that “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.”

Two Simple Steps to Success in Marriage:

There are many ways to mess up love because we humans have a bent toward, selfish, controlling and basically stupid choices. However, God helped us out. To have a super successful relationship, there are really two basic steps, two simple ingredients:

1. Be near God.
2. Be nice.

If you, as an individual, stay close to God, and “abide in Christ,” meaning that every moment of every day your heart says, “God, I want to do life your way,” then God becomes your personal marriage coach. His Spirit will whisper, “Let’s try saying what you just said in a better way. Say you’re sorry. Do something romantic tonight; etc.” Undercover and Secret Service agents wear microphones hidden in their ears so they can protect people like the President. God is like that microphone when it comes to protecting your love. He will whisper what to do (or not do) to you. If you obey, you can win at love.

And the second, “Be nice,” should be so obvious that you do it by nature. Unfortunately, it is not natural to be nice so we end up being hardest on the people we love the most! In reality, it takes so little to be nice. If you open doors, put away the dishes, pick up the house, bring him a glass of water, your spouse is drawn to you. It is the little things that will add up to create a loving environment in your new home.

It is a little like a math formula: 1 +1=2. So “be near God” + “be nice”= a beautiful sex life “2gether”!

Pam and Bill Farrel are international speakers and best selling authors of over 28 books on relationships. They can be contacted at www.farrelcommunications.com or 800-810-4449.